g.Show - 非诚勿扰 (2014)

The last part is here:   Show - 非诚勿扰

The show is here:   非诚勿扰 (2014)

Hehehe ... To fight depression, I have been watching day and night the show.

The show is so interesting. You would find lots of assholes and nasty characters. You will see it in both guys and gals alike. There are goodies and there are nasties. I guess in life it is also the same.

I am going to embark on the largest project in my life and I have chosen too my partner-in-crime for the implementation.

I don't know what the future holds. But I am willing to give it a go.

Life is very short. I have already walk more than half way through. I don't want to keep guessing. I am going to go with the heart. Hopefully one day I can proudly proclaim that there is goodness left in the human race.

I just want to listen to a song:   新鸳鸯蝴蝶梦

昨日像那东流水离我远去不可留今日乱我心多烦忧 抽刀断水水更流举杯消愁愁更愁明朝清风四飘流 由来只闻新人笑有谁听到旧人哭爱情两个字好辛苦 是要问一个明白还是要装作糊涂知多知少难知足 看似个鸳鸯蝴蝶不应该的年代可是谁又能摆脱人世间的悲哀 花花世界鸳鸯蝴蝶在人间已是癫何苦要上青天不如温柔同眠

I still like 笑傲江湖 (粤版)

愿那风是我愿那月是我柳底飞花是我对酒当歌做个洒脱的我不理世界说我是何只要 ... 重做个真的我回问那假的我半生为何眠后醉醉后眠眠后再醉又眠岂求什么重做个真 ... 江湖笑.

How many of us can truly do the ultimate 笑傲江湖 ... ?

Let's enjoy the show ...

b.Land - Rights

The last part is here:   Land - The Waterfall 

Each land has different rights. Learn to defeat each right.

Tenure
means you must get estate-in-fee-simple, i.e., freehold land. Leasehold is a joke and never fall for it no matter how cheap. You don't actually own the land but you have tenure in freehold. You are like a knight given control of land masses by the king and may collect taxes.

Surface rights 
are “every right in land other than mining rights.” It is quite normal for you when purchasing land to have surface rights. This is a powerful right.

Someone who owns surface rights to land owns not only the surface but also the air space above it (subject to the rights of others, such as airlines) and any sand, gravel, peat, clay or marl which can be excavated by surface operations.

However, surface rights do not include ownership of minerals. Someone who owns mineral rights to land may own one specific mineral, several specified minerals or all of the minerals (except gold and silver, which, with few exceptions, are the property of the country).

Mining rights
are “the right to minerals on, in, or under the land.” This right is normally not given to the land purchaser (90% of the land masses). You must learn to defeat this right.

Miners will try to stake the land by applying to the land office. Normally this right is granted to the miners for a fee per year. The fucking miner will dig here and there for minerals and the miner need not even give notice to the landowner for the activities. Most of the time, he don't even cover back the holes he drilled.

A mining claim cannot be staked out nor can prospecting be done on the part of the land if any of the following is done:

• house/residence/cottage/dwelling
• church 
• cemetery 
• public building 
• spring
• artificial reservoir
• dam or waterworks 
• outhouse 
• manufactory
• a garden, orchard, vineyard, nursery, plantation or pleasure ground or where crops can be damaged

The last exemption is the most important and the one used to defeat this mineral rights:

• Crop: Crop is given a broad interpretation and includes grass and hay fields. ‘Orchard’ can consist of several fruit trees on the land. You need at least 14 fruit trees to form an orchard.
• Vineyard: “Plots” that are managed in the usual agricultural sense for personal or commercial purposes.
• Nursery: “Nursery stock” are coniferous or hardwood seedlings, transplants, grafts, or trees propagated or grown in a nursery and with the roots attached, and includes cuttings with or without the roots attached. Nursery stock grown for sale as: 1. any place where fruit trees, fruit stock, or ornamental plants are propagated for sale; 2. a place where plants other than herbaceous plants are grown, for the purpose of marketing. 3 Plantation: A woodlot.
• Pleasure Ground: Grounds for recreation, including summer resort locations. 
• Waterworks: Any public, commercial or industrial works for the collection, production, treatment, storage, supply, and distribution of water or any part of any such waterworks.
• Waterworks system: Any system of plants, wells, structures, equipment, pipes, apparatus or other things for the obtaining, treating, purifying, disinfecting, distributing or supplying of water intended to be used for human consumption or in swimming pools and, without limitation, includes aqueducts , cisterns, culverts, cuts, flumes, m a ins, pumps, reservoirs, tanks, engines, and machinery used in connection with the system.

That is, start improving the land as soon as you have connected or not power into the land. The best is to plant hardwood seedlings. It cost only a couple of thousands of dollars to start and finish.

Timber rights
reserved means that all the timber (trees) standing on the property are not included with the property. These trees are reserved to the government- or to an individual. This includes all tree species except Pine trees.

Although the government owns the trees they do require the permission of the property owner to harvest those trees. If the property owner wishes to harvest the trees on the parcel, the owner must call the government. A stumpage fee is owed to the government when harvested. When timber rights are included, the property owner owns the trees- except the Pine- unless the deed states, “all pine rights are included”. Pine trees are reserved to the government- meaning that all Pine trees standing on the land are owned by the government. The property owner does not own these trees. To harvest Pine trees you must contact the government. The Pine rights can be purchased from the Government.

This right is not too biggie although timber rights should always be alienated.

My Comment

It is alright to buy land only with the surface rights. But, you must defeat the other rights immediately by doing something to it. Normally a simple improvement to the land would allow you to have the cake and eat it. But, if you are lazy, you are waiting to be fully defeated. A lazy guy has no place in town.

If ever possible, I would fully establish an alpaca farm on it. An alpaca farm is not very monied in nature but yield enough for full-time workers. You can then alienate a small part of the land to conduct high money items such as ginseng, truffles, fox, deer velvets or wine. 

The song is here:    白狐 (正式版) - 陳瑞

我是一隻 愛了千年的狐
千年愛戀 千年孤獨
長夜裡你可知 我的紅妝為誰補

紅塵中你可知 我的秀髮為誰梳

我是一隻守候千年的狐
千年守候 千年無助
情到深處 看我用美麗為你起舞
愛到痛時 聽我用歌聲為你傾訴

寒窗苦讀　你我海誓山盟銘心刻骨
金榜花燭　卻是天涯漫漫陌路殊途

能不能讓我為愛哭一哭
我還是千百年前愛你的白狐
多少春去 春來 朝朝暮暮
生生世世都是你的狐

能不能讓我為愛哭一哭

我還是千百年來不變的白狐
多少春去 春來 朝朝暮暮
來生來世還做你的狐

我是一隻守候千年的狐
千年守候 千年無助　
情到深處 看我用美麗為你起舞　
愛到痛時 聽我用歌聲為你傾訴

寒窗苦讀 你我海誓山盟銘心刻骨
金榜花燭 卻是天涯漫漫陌路殊途

能不能讓我為愛哭一哭
我還是千百年前愛你的白狐
多少春去 春來 朝朝暮暮
生生世世都是你的狐

能不能讓我為愛哭一哭
我還是千百年來不變的白狐

多少春去 春來 朝朝暮暮
來生來世還做你的狐

多少春去 春來 朝朝暮暮
來生來世還做你的狐

來生來世還做你的狐

Let's enjoy the song ...

(Another very quiet night for me ... It is so difficult to grind the nose alone) 

p.Song - 問世間 - 張德蘭

The last part is here:   Song - Morning has Broken

The song is here:   問世間+留住今日情(無線電視劇《神鵰俠侶》插曲1983年)-張德蘭

問世間
神雕俠侶插曲 張德蘭 作詞：元好問 作曲：顧嘉煇 

問世間,情是何物? 直教生死相許. 
天南地北, 雙飛客, 老翅幾回寒暑.
歡樂趣, 離別苦, 就中更有痴兒女.
君應有語, 渺萬里層雲, 千山暮雪, 隻影向誰去.

Totally listening to her songs. So fantastic.

Now rewatching 《神鵰俠侶》 - 1983 serial.

The only way to keep myself sane in this onslaught of yellow locusts invasion of the white land. Totally viscous. Totally brutal. Totally damaging. Totally not home-coming.

The only joke I enjoyed is that every yellowskin I met on the street I saw no smile. Life must have been hard for them too. LOL.

That's the price to pay for not huddling together. But, what do they know? I am only just another clown yellowskin trying to make it in white land. Nothing special. Nothing spectacular. I just have to make my way through the white waters. I have nothing to give them. I don't even patronize their stores.

I guess yellowskins only know best how to bully their own kind.

Please enjoy the song ...

p.Song - Morning has Broken

The last part is here:   Trust - Vincent van Gogh

The song is here:   Cat Stevens - Morning Has Broken - [Live 1976]

Morning has broken, like the first morning
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning
Praise for the springing fresh from the word
Sweet the rain's new fall, sunlit from heaven
Like the first dew fall, on the first grass
Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden
Sprung in completeness where his feet pass
Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning
Born of the one light, Eden saw play
Praise with elation, praise every morning
God's recreation of the new day

I am sorry. I realized the more I collect. The lonelier I become. The greater the equation, more whites are becoming friends to me, but to what end?

Of all the things I have collected, I lack the most important one thing - warmth.

The winter chills are raging just outside the window, you can't even spend 10 seconds outdoor. The -35degC will freeze your ass off. Come to think of it, life is so fragile. Just step off the house, in less than 5 minutes, I would have absolutely no more feeling.

Every time, a major event hits me. This song will come to my mind. For each fucking time, I was always so happy and yet at the same time, so apprehensive for the world ahead. Without someone beside me to wild my time off, I will always be apprehensive I guess.

News really travel fast and far, now every yellowskin and white congratulated me on my new found rank. Without a close kin, such victory is so hollow.

Let's hope that when I am finally home, there are still kins left.

Let's enjoy the song ...

p.My Heart must Go On ...

The last part is here:   Article - Unwilling to Burden Family with Medical Bills, 95 year old Samsui Woman Commits Suicide (II)

The full show is here:   千与千寻
The song is here:   千与千寻-片尾曲（童年回忆）

You must watch the show first in Japanese and then in other languages.

Tonight, I am unusually quiet. Scene by scene, my video just passes me by. I looked back, I looked forward, I looked left, I looked right, I looked up and I looked down. I realized I couldn't find myself. I have no spirit. Life just passes me by. In reality, I don't even exist.

After reviewing so many bad incidents, they blaze at me like a thunderclap. I can no longer turn a blind eye to all the miseries around me.

I may have been doing marginally better than most, but I am definitely not as well off as I can do charity full-time. I too realized that I am but a small candle burning with a weak flame.

Nonetheless I am still a candle, a candle no matter how weak can still give warmth to others. I can no longer shut my eyes and ears and pretend that nothing has happened. I cannot lie to myself that I am too weak to help. I really cannot. In short, I am just selfish. I can't even hold a candle and stand upright in front of the grand dame. I felt so small.

Once upon a time, in a land far away, a poor student received money to study at higher institutions. He was happy and excited that at last he can contribute to the wellness of everybody. But life was nasty to him. He was dejected to no ends.

Now he witnessed the death of an supreme old lady who gave her life for the betterment of everybody else. In fact, I am sure some of her monies also found its way to help this poor student during his studies.

The question now then is how can this poor student who benefited from superb education, courtesy of the old lady, turn his back to the lady's plight?

He could not. He  cannot. He will not.

My lady, thank you for alerting the dormant dragon in me. I cannot promise anything after your passing and contribute directly to your kins. But, I will work myself to the ground and for the goodness of the group of people who has built our home, so that I can once again get back my dignity and regain your respect.

My regrets have been although I can build a 1000 buildings per land, the white people will not be too kind to me for letting in the flood gate.

Mdm, please let me work my magic. I am sure there is a way.

For now, at least I have found my footing and even if I have helped only just one family, I am sure my forefathers before me will still accept me among the stars.

I have said many times before, each of us are off-springs of very high quality genes, if ever we had once before a weaker gene, we wouldn't have lived till now. In fact, the cold calculations of Mdm showed that age didn't blind her 20/20 vision, she knew exactly what to do when it is time for love offerings.

Thank you, Mdm.

May you bless each and every one of us who are still living to work towards a better future. Your death has enlightened me not to be blinded by physical wonders but to seek salvation of one's soul. What's the use of living when one is still indebted to and not paying back another's charity.

With so many decades more to go, Mdm, please bless me and those who will come forward to your rally call.

Goodbye, till we meet again among the stars ...

p.Article - Unwilling to Burden Family with Medical Bills, 95 year old Samsui Woman Commits Suicide (II)

The last part is here:   Article - Unwilling to Burden Family with Medical Bills, 95 year old Samsui Woman Commits Suicide

Chao chee bye ... As expected, this news has more or less died down. People are so superior-scented. But, they never know, once upon their blood-line, they must have had it bad too. So, please don't feel superior, there is none to begin with. Don't ever try to let karma extinguishes your blood-line like that of Hitler's and Stalin's.

I would like to say "thank you" to asingaporeanson, for writing about her in the essay, Die Can, Sick Cannot.

So much memories ... my partner-in-crime just told me that his mother might know her personally. I have already asked him to make arrangement for me to pay my respect to her when I next visit.

My blooded relation was in construction too. Back in those days, every one of us yellowskin was construction worker. We are part of a very big family with very common thoughts. My blooded relation had poor eye-sight due to poor working conditions. Did the fuckens knew? I bet they did. But, who cares!

If fuckens don't honour her, that doesn't mean I cannot do it. They are actually beneath my reproach.

Madam Lu, 
I would like you to watch this classic show - 
枇杷巷口故人來 (全劇) - 任劍輝 白雪仙

Please enjoy ...

I concurred with asingaporeanson. When I first landed in white land, I worked as a construction site worker, carrying rocks and breaking cement, at minimum wage for 8 bucks an hour, break-times were not counted as work. I couldn't even last 2 weeks in a construction site. Most whites are double my height. I was told to go by my boss, let alone trying for 40 years. This is not funny.

Rest well, please, Mdm ... May your life story be remembered ... I also hope that your family will allow your story to be remembered for future generations, learning from you the selfless and silent sacrifice. We shall drink to your goodness.

Yellowskins did not fail. They are hard-working, resourceful, thrifty and silent campaigners.

Based on the above qualities, the yellowskins would have done well everywhere they venture. But, no. Once they established themselves in foreign soil, instead of remembering how hard they have come along and help those newer, they choose to tekan the newer and burr-er immigrants, as the much easier targets.

But, to what ends, what comes round, goes round. The yellowskins then degenerate and become weak once again, to be tekan by others. Yellowskins' history is so full of such examples.

Tonight, let me focus on Madam Lu and those whom we might or might not have known, who have worked so tiredlessly for a future. She didn't let herself down. It is fuckens, men mouthing honesty, equality and honour, that have let her down. She has fulfilled her part of the bargain. I would very much like to fulfill mine by honouring her. 

It takes great courage to move from China to south. It takes even greater courage to judge what's good for the family and end it all. Your courageous act is no less significant than a soldier who throws himself on a land mine, so that his companions may not be pinned down in a hopeless struggle to survive.

Money cannot buy this act ... It must first come from love ...

My blood relation and my partner-in-crime's mum must have known you in person, staying in the same area. You are definitely family to us.

Rest well ... go well ...

(Purple Heart)

(Deep bow) x 3 ...

p.Show - 射雕英雄传 1983 (part II)

The last part is here:   Show - 射雕英雄传 1983 

The best songs:
四张机 (《射雕英雄傳之東邪西毒》插曲)

四张机
演唱：甄妮

四张机
鸳鸯织就欲双飞
可怜未老头先白
春波碧草 晓寒深处
相对浴红衣

桃花開 (《射雕英雄傳之東邪西毒》插曲)

千愁記舊情 (《射雕英雄傳之華山論劍》插曲) - 羅文

千愁記舊情
射鵰英雄傳之華山論劍插曲
沒有月也不見星 迷茫路伴孑影
從此斯人失去 剩我千愁記舊情
紅日再不會升 熱心漸似冰 從此星沉天際 剩我低徊血淚凝
日日伴隨難再現 夜夜叫喚亦不應
舊日笑面上的萬般千種親愛 消失風中 風卻未靜
含淚訴不清 問天未有聲 何日再歡顏相見 復得斯人說舊情

肯去承擔爱（甄妮）

肯去承擔爱（甄妮）
曲 : 顾 嘉 辉　词 : 黄 沾
早已明知对他的爱 开始就不应该
我却愿将一世 交换他一次真意对待
我是宁可抛去生命 痴心决不愿改
为了他甘心去忍受 人间一切悲哀
在我心中这份浓情 没有东西能代
肯去承担爱的苦痛 敢去面对未来
我是宁愿改我生命 痴心也不愿改
...

四张机 鸳鸯织就欲双飞 可怜未老头先白 春波碧草 晓寒深处 相对浴红衣 ...

So simple ... So perfect a rhythm ...

Life is actually a very simple thing. We just have to live a simple and passionate style.

The hero in the show is 郭靖. A dumb guy who is just pure hard-working and very straight. I can identify with him. Being cunning is never my cup of tea. May tengri saves me from temptations of greed. But, on the other hand, I always had 杨康 in my mind. Trying to employ cunning all the time. 一念一天堂，一念一地狱 ... Sigh ...

30 full years have passed me by ...

Do join me to watch the show in its former glory ...

p.Show - 射雕英雄传 1983

The last part is here:   Show - 天龍八部之六脈神劍 1982 

The show is here:   射雕英雄传83版 粤语

The actors were 黄日华,翁美玲,苗侨伟,杨盼盼. A beautiful combination. This is a very, very good show. Never stopped watching every 10 years. Another journey opens ...

Plenty of chance to cry.
满江红 - 罗文

怒髮衝冠 憑欄處 瀟瀟雨歇
抬望眼 仰天長嘯 壯懷激烈
三十功名塵與土 八千里路雲和月
莫等閒 白了少年頭 空悲切
靖康恥 猶未雪 臣子恨 何時滅
駕長車 踏破賀蘭山闕
壯志飢餐胡虜肉 笑談渴飲匈奴血
待從頭 收拾舊山河 朝天闕

To survive, we have to surround ourselves with familiar objects. Don't try to assimilate. You would be disappointed.

On this land, there are so many pinoys. They are locusts to the land. Don't trust any pinoys. The guys and gals are great consters. I have no good fuckens with them.

It may seem slow if we don't integrate with the locals, we would be shunt from their communities. But, what's the use of joining their communities to feel lost. Our direction is to be hard working. You won't learn it right from them. Most of the locals are so used to be lazy that we would end up even more lost. These guys are willing to take on jobs that are always at minimum wages. They talked non-stopped about the weather. But, I couldn't. I can't even live just for myself. Such is the difference. We just have to burn a little more to get going faster.

I just received good news that my wares have orders. A very, very small order indeed, but, it was good enough for me. A very honest deal. A very delightful project. I wish all who were involved happy days. This project is very important not only to me, but to all the families involved with the project. If done correctly, this business will feed them and their families for the next thousand years. I am glad to be of good company. First, I would like to thank my partner-in-crime for believing in me that a maverick like me could be controlled and directed towards greatness. My humble thank-you to him. Next, I would like to thank a friend. She single-handedly against all odds fulfilled my bidding. Harshly, at many times. I apologized for my brashness. It was the pressure to see the project through. It was so hard, hard, hard for 4 long years. I hope she forgives me for the bad behaviour. I will do my utmost never to disappoint her. There are many others. You and I know who we all are. A big thank-you. I better don't listed them out. Lol. Otherwise, my infrastructure is as naked as the day.

We must be in business. Fool's stop.

Let's enjoy the show ... I will comment about the show later ...

g.Trust - Vincent van Gogh

The last part is here:   Book - Far from the Madding Crowd

When one is lonely, it is so easy to cry. Every little opportunity is an opportunity to cry. Facing the four walls and with the slightest sound, the walls will resonate non-stopped. Tonight is that night. So silent, so cold and so very alone. The throat tasted bitter and swollen.

Without fail, the past will just zipped by like an old, old worn movie. Repeating every scene of regret as if I had not been punished enough.

Vincent has accompanied me through some of darkest times in my life. The song (Starry Starry Night) sang by Don McLean on his behalf was and still is so apt for me:

I used not to understand why Vincent could cut his ear as if it was never a part of him. Now I understand. When life is so painful to continue living, even extreme physical pain is no longer as painful as the heart's pain. I was once like that and now I understand even more so. Whenever I think of her, I really don't mind cutting myself up and pay with my blood, if only I could turn the clock back and unblood my hands ...

I don't mind losing any gals in my life. Even if I had invested true feelings in them, I wouldn't even mind the numbing of the soul after that. But, gals are never merciful creatures. They will always seek to destroy the guy's total mind and soul to exact their price.

For this one gal in my life, it was amazing that for all the things I have done for her. She chose to take away my entire soul as payment. I didn't fail her in any aspect. We had afterall 一夜夫妻百日恩。Why the need to hurt some one you have loved so dearly once. Sigh ...

"This world was never meant for one
As beautiful as you."

I don't know where is she now. I just hope that she is happy and find peace. So much blood ... Tonight allow me to drink to your health. I pray that the little one will too bless and love you always. After all, you were once a mother to him.

I wrote this essay is not to lay blame on anyone. I just wish that there was never blood in my hands ... I was never born ruthless ...

“Be clearly aware of the stars and infinity on high. Then life seems almost enchanted after all.”

“It is good to love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is well done.”

“I dream my painting and I paint my dream.”

“There is nothing more truly artistic than to love people.”

“I don't know anything with certainty, but seeing the stars makes me dream.”

“I would rather die of passion than of boredom.”

“If you hear a voice within you say 'you cannot paint', then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced.”

“The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reason for remaining ashore.”

“I put my heart and soul into my work, and I have lost my mind in the process.”

“What am I in the eyes of most people — a nonentity, an eccentric, or an unpleasant person — somebody who has no position in society and will never have; in short, the lowest of the low. All right, then — even if that were absolutely true, then I should one day like to show by my work what such an eccentric, such a nobody, has in his heart. That is my ambition, based less on resentment than on love in spite of everything, based more on a feeling of serenity than on passion. Though I am often in the depths of misery, there is still calmness, pure harmony and music inside me. I see paintings or drawings in the poorest cottages, in the dirtiest corners. And my mind is driven towards these things with an irresistible momentum.”

“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?”

“It is with the reading of books the same as with looking at pictures; one must, without doubt, without hesitations, with assurance, admire what is beautiful.”

“I try more and more to be myself, caring relatively little whether people approve or disapprove.”

“Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together.”

“At present I absolutely want to paint a starry sky. It often seems to me that night is still more richly coloured than the day; having hues of the most intense violets, blues and greens. If only you pay attention to it you will see that certain stars are lemon-yellow, others pink or a green, blue and forget-me-not brilliance. And without my expatiating on this theme it is obvious that putting little white dots on the blue-black is not enough to paint a starry sky.”

Now you understand why Vincent is my true friend?

I hope I can still sleep a little ...

p.Song - 中華民國建國一百年主題曲《我們的一百年》

The last part is here:   Song - 心債 1984

I have not blogged for a long time since I have been alone. Alone facing the white world. Cold and wintry. Everywhere around me is pure white. Nothing's growing. No friends. No contacts. No favours to ask. No deeds to pay.

Suddenly saw the videos via some forum. Suddenly my tears seem unstoppable.

After 5000 years, the chinaman has been forced time and again to wonder into the wilderness.

According to page 17 of Dr Calhoun's Experiment:

"No small part of this ugly barbarization has been due to sheer physical congestion: a diagnosis now partly confirmed with scientific experiments with rats – for when they are placed in equally congested quarters, they exhibit the same symptoms of stress, alienation, hostility, sexual perversion, parental incompetence, and rabid violence that we now find in the Megalopolis."

At the top of the hierarchy, the leaders were extremely increasingly aggressive towards the lesser beings, protecting their turfs with sheer ugliness. The lesser ones became exceedingly withdrawn and docile, no longer bothered about their lives.

According to page 35 of Dr Calhoun's Experiment:

"In his early experiments in the outdoor pens, Calhoun had witnessed a creative act by his rats that he likened to the discovery of the wheel by man: when building a new burrow they did not simply dig out the dirt as they went, as any normal rat would do, instead they packed it into a large ball which they then rolled out (Calhoun 1973b). This innovation had not come from the socially dominant animals but from a highly disorganized and predominantly homosexual group of subordinates, partially withdrawn from the larger social organization. As Calhoun saw it, the repression they had suffered at the hands of their superiors had resulted in deviant, creative, and thus adaptive behaviour (Calhoun 1977: 30). Inspired by this example, in his laboratory at NIMH, Calhoun attempted to design rodent universes that would both stimulate, resulting in “creative deviants,” and ameliorate: removing the worst excesses of crowding pathology. Through a variety of methods, such as operant conditioning and determining which of the mice and rats could eat, sleep, live, with whom, he sought to design ever more intelligent and collaborative rodent communities, capable of withstanding ever greater degrees of density."

Now you understand why taxi drivers can give birth to army scholars in that fucken little island and later misused by the fucken old guy like lap-dogs (just read Animal Farm by George Orwell).

Intelligence like what I have always suspected is a curse. It has nothing good. Based on space competition, humans are forced to be intelligent and ruthless.

My tears are drying now. Loneliness is important part of the quest. For my future generations, I am willing to lay my life for them. I felt like a one-man country. I will soldier on and see my battles through, no matter how lonely that quest would have to be.

My partner-in-crime recently said, "My brother, would you ever like to be the lorry behind your bloodied relation's Porche engine?"

Yes. Bloodily wise and clear in his thoughts. I will never bother them about my sorry station. For that, my current quest should not falter. The foundation stone has already been laid by their fore-fathers. I am here only to build that wall around all the forbidden cities and the Tiananmens, or Gates of Heavenly Peace, protecting them from snow and heat.

The signs so far have been positive. The white has been extremely kind to me. They have given me time and space to build what I have lost. But, I can't say the same for chinamen that I know. They are busy pecking at my feet for droppings. Maybe they were too driven by circumstances to behave like that, but I am still not convinced that I should show mercy.

Next week, I have an important meeting to attend. This meeting hopes to cement my relationship with the whites. Basically, I am the dole-provider, but they have to give me good rates. I just have to be outwardly kind and submissive.

One white felt so bad about my current station that he volunteered his drug business to me. He asked to be his runner. In return, he would give me food and shelter. It is interesting in that the whites don't kill like the yellowskins, they prefer to help the lesser beings. I might seem to be abusing their kindness and generosity at this moment. But, I would pay them back by employing their youngs giving them food and shelter in time. I am not selfless, I am just been being exact.

Let this essay be a record of that promise:

If I have been helped by the stronger whites, I shall return that favour to help the lesser whites in time. 

Let me, if tengri is willing, reveal my hundred years of 建國 too ...

p.Song - 心債 1984

The last part is here:   Song - 逝去的諾言 (陳慧嫻 1984)

The song is here:   梅艷芳 心 債 1982 (this link has many songs after)

電視劇《香城浪子》主題曲
歌詞 作詞：詞：黃沾 作曲：顧嘉輝

重重心中癡債  原是欠下你一世  無限無盡愛在我心底
悠悠心中癡意  源源不絕撫慰  只望可補償一切  明明用盡了努力
明明事事都不計  為什麼萬般癡心  都等如枉費  原來今生心債
償還不是一世  千代千生難估計
( MUSIC )
悠悠心中癡意  源源不絕撫慰  望可補償一切  明明用盡了努力
明明事事都不計  為什麼萬般癡心  都等如枉費  原來今生心債
償還不是一世  千代千生難估計

Again my heart is very soft today. Scenes from the past just flashed passed me like an old and ancient story. So many happy moments, also so much more sadness. Tears were so uncontrollable.

I have said that one day, I would bring my true love to a place I called my birth-place. We would sit by the river and play with the cool water. I would tell her about my dreams. I would show her my martial arts. I would expound my military strategies like a proud general. I do have only simple hope and simple joy. I am so easily pleased.

But, the strange world had made me into a monster. I am now scarred for life. I am no longer the young innocent lad that you once knew me. I was then but a simple soul. Why did you reach me and then dump me like a used rag? Why did you see only the money part and forget about within that body therein lies a soft soul that could be harmed so easily.

I blamed no one but myself and myself only. I hope that one day you would finally find happiness again, happiness that you never did get from me. I never detect any love from you, I guess you never once love me. I hope you finally find your true love and happiness now.

Don't use any more deceit to any new guy that comes along as it has harmed me totally. Maybe you wouldn't do that charade if you had truly loved.

It is now so difficult for me to love again. So much restraints. So much uncertainties.

Now that, I have almost grown to another level. I guess you never knew that a fallen guy could still move on to find that path that truly defines him. It is a path that beyond my wildest dream, but yet the person that is going to witness this is not you. I had all along wanted it to be you. I had so much wanted to show it off to you that I have finally arrived. But, I guess that option is no longer possible. I can't share it with some one that doesn't love me at all. Sigh ... so much lost time.

Although there are so many mis-steps, I believe we still all live to a better future. I will learn to treasure ever more those that are true to me.

Thank you once again for the negative instruction. I will learn my lesson well. I truly beared no more blame game. I only blame myself for being so blind to all the signs. To let go is, I guess, my best salvation. I am slow and still reminiscing the hurt, but I will get there some day.

All my life, I had been a beta. Small, happy and contented. The cruel life dictates that I must be an alpha. Now that I am a true alpha, I still long to be a beta.

p.Song - 逝去的諾言 (陳慧嫻 1984)

The last part part is here:   The End of a Good Final Chapter

The song is here:   金曲重溫: 陳慧嫻 逝去的諾言 1984 

逝去的諾言 

曲/詞：安格斯

相識是偶然 無奈愛心頃刻變
你在我 又或是我在你 內心曾許下諾言
誰說有不散筵席 誰說生死不變 

這份愛　讓這份愛被流水一一衝染
此刻共對亦無言 流露我心中淒怨
看著你 我愁懷滿臉 淚水有如灑在面前
我的心怎忍說離別 凝望你輕忽走遠
已別去 是已別去 讓時光洗去悲怨

此刻共對亦無言 流露我心中淒怨
看著你 我愁懷滿臉 淚水有如灑在面前
我的心怎忍說離別 凝望你輕忽走遠
已別去 是已別去 讓時光洗去悲怨

Things are amazing nowadays, it seems like for every bad thing that happened to the past me is now rewarded with each a good thing. I am so fearful now, when will these good things end? When will I have to meet the bad again. When I seek land, they gave me free access. When I seek business, they gave me free channels. I have been given decades of hard life and misery, is this what they call a good turn?

All the shows are here:   笑傲江湖

The song is here:   笑傲江湖 (林青霞)

沧海笑 滔滔两岸潮
浮沉随浪记今朝
苍天笑 纷纷世上潮
谁负谁胜出天知晓
江山笑 烟雨遥
涛浪涛尽红尘俗事知多少
清风笑竟惹寂寥
豪情还剩了一襟晚照
苍生笑 不再寂寥
豪情仍在痴痴笑笑


红尘多可笑　痴情最无聊
目空一切也好 此生未了
心却已无所扰　只想换得半世逍遥
醒时对人笑　梦中全忘掉
叹天黑得太早 来生难料
爱恨一笔勾消  对酒当歌我只愿开心到老

*风再冷不想逃　花再美也不想要　
任我飘摇 天越高心越小　
不问因果有多少　独自醉倒
今天哭明天笑　不求有人能明了　
一身骄傲 歌在唱舞在跳
长夜漫漫不觉晓　将快乐寻找
(重覆*)


愿那风是我 愿那月是我

柳底飞花是我 对酒当歌

做个洒脱的我 不理世界说我是何

只要做个真我 在笑声里度过

懒管它功或过 对酒当歌

莫计一切因果 风里雨里也快活赏心地过

重做个真的我 回问那假的我

半生为何 眠后醉　醉后眠

眠后再醉又眠 岂求什么

重做个真的我 回望那假的我

笑痴又傻 谁是我　我是谁

无谓理我是谁 更加好过

The cantonese song is here:  只记今朝笑 - 林青霞 (粤语)

滄海一聲笑...... 白雲俏，艷陽照，襯我逍遙調； 自由是我，心裡只記，今朝的歡笑。 開心的感覺，傾心的快樂，今天開了心竅。 落霞如血，紅日如醉，我抱擁奇妙。 浮塵隨浪，只記，今朝的歡笑。 熱情和唱，縱情傲嘯，看透江湖玄妙。 自由來去，不盡逍遙，瀟灑得不得了。 笑面向，滔滔啊，他朝有誰能料？ 浮塵隨浪，只記，今朝的歡笑。 開心的感覺，傾心的快樂，今天開了心竅。 【間奏】 滄海一聲笑...... 白雲俏，艷陽照，襯我逍遙調； 自由是我，心裡只記，今朝的歡笑。 瀟灑得不得了...瀟灑得不得了... 瀟灑得不得了...瀟灑得不得了... 

The song is here:   只记今朝笑 (林青霞)

白云飘呀绿水摇 世界多逍遥 自由的风呀 自在的鸟 今朝的欢笑 多么的快乐 多么的美妙 多么的不得了 唱你的歌呀 唱我的调 唱尽世间逍遥 嗯嗯...只记 今朝的欢笑 心在飘呀身在摇 唱我逍遥调 快乐的人唱快乐歌谣 声声都是欢笑 笑看呀滔滔潮 世界好逍遥 浮沉随浪只记 今朝的欢笑 多么的快乐 多么的美妙 多么的不得了 白云飘呀绿水摇 世界多逍遥 自由的风呀 自在的鸟 今朝的欢笑 快乐得不得了 快乐得不得了...... 快乐得不得了 快乐得不得了...... 快乐得不得了 快乐得不得了...... 快乐得不得了 快乐得不得了......

These shows and songs are so amazing. I am truly humbled by its creativity. 我是笑傲江湖。

天下风云出我辈，一入江湖岁月摧。
皇图霸业笑谈中，不胜人生一场醉。
提剑跨骑挥鬼雨，白骨如山鸟惊飞。
尘事如潮人如水，只叹江湖几人回。

江湖, 只要有人, 就有恩怨！ 有恩怨，就有江湖！ 人就是江湖，你怎麼退出!?!

Let's enjoy the shows and songs ...

p.Song - 一生何求

The last part is here:   人生什么最苦?

一生何求 (陳百強: 一生何求Song)
歌词 曲：王文清 词：潘伟源 编曲：苏德华
冷暖哪可休 
回头多少个秋
寻遍了却偏失去 
未盼却在手
我得到没有 
没法解释得失错漏 
刚刚听到望到便更改
不知哪里追究
一生何求 
常判决放弃与拥有 
耗尽我这一生 
触不到已跑开 
一生何求 
迷惘里永远看不透 
没料到我所失的 
竟已是我的所有 
---music---
冷暖哪可休
回头多少个秋
寻遍了却偏失去
未盼却在手
我得到没有
没法解释得失错漏
刚刚听到望到便更改
不知哪里追究
一生何求
常判决放弃与拥有
耗尽我这一生
触不到已跑开
一生何求
迷惘里永远看不透
没料到我所失的
竟已是我的所有
 ---music---
一生何求
曾妥协也试过苦斗
梦内每点缤纷
一消散哪可收
一生何求
谁计较赞美与诅咒 
没料到我所失的
竟已是我的所有
一生何求
常判决放弃与拥有
耗尽我这一生
触不到已跑开
一生何求
迷惘里永远看不透
没料到我所失的
竟已 是我的所有 

Sigh ... This song is so poisonous, it has accompanied through many rounds of downs and tribulations. How much burden can I still bear?

The yoke is heavy and the body is weak.

To hunt is always a lonely task. Not every hunter shares the same prey. What's more my preys are so exotic ... All my songs are sang to no one. No one wants to understand the pain involved before the hunt. There is simply too much work. They only want to hear the spoils.

Indeed, I have no audience.    

温兆伦 - 一生何價 (Song)

用一生热爱
编我心里梦
苍天却捉弄
用一生力气
讲我心里话
声声散失风中
用一生夜晚
等你的脚步
偏得破的梦
用一生热恋
等你相与共
情消烟雨中
最苦相依不相恋
每夜相聚
偏偏欠好梦
最苦相思不相守
情深竟分隔
回首一片空

b.Her Daughter

The mother, 0.50000 has a beautiful daughter, 0.25000. After I have conquered her mother, then I will try my luck on the daughter. Right now, due to timing issue, I can't propose a dangerous liaison for her mother. Soon, I hope, soon ... This is so dangerous that I must tread with care. I don't wish to be murdered before sunrise. Courtship is so fun and yet so deadly. I have no friends to ask for help but yet, I need that little help in each turn. Some times I go into some self-pity. But, what else can I do but to swallow up everything whole and grit my teeth. Life can only be easier each step that I don't ask for help. A little longer way, longer time, longer effort, but yet the shortest path.

四张机。鸳鸯织就欲双飞。可怜未老头先白。春波碧草，晓寒深处，相对浴红衣。

The song is here. 

江城子（乙卯正月二十日记梦）
苏轼
十年生死两茫茫，不思量，自难忘。千里孤坟，无处话凄凉。纵使相逢应不识，尘满面，鬓如霜。 夜来幽梦忽还乡，小轩窗，正梳妆。相顾无言，惟有泪千行。料得年年肠断处，明月夜，短松冈。

p.Rouge 胭脂扣 (1988)

Rouge 胭脂扣 (1988) is a story about Chan Chen-Pang, better known as the "12th Young Master" (played by Leslie Cheung), was a fashionable playboy who frequented the opium dens prevalent in Hong Kong in 1934, where he met the high-class and much sought-after courtesan, Fleur (Anita Mui).

The story is quite normal but the song 胭脂扣 (Leslie) or 胭脂扣 (Anita) is nice.

作詞：鄧景生
作曲：黎小田
編曲：黎小田

誓言幻作煙雲字　費盡千般心思
情像火灼般熱　怎燒一生一世　延續不容易

負情是你的名字　錯付千般相思
情像水向東逝去　癡心枉傾注　願那天未曾遇

只盼相依　哪管見盡遺憾世事
漸老芳華　愛火未滅人面變異

祈求在那天重遇　訴盡千般相思
祈望不再辜負我　癡心的關注　人被愛留住
(祈望不再辜負我　癡心的關注)　問那天會重遇

It is not easy to find one that one truly loves. If you ever get there, do think hard before jumping ship. It may cost you more.